戦って 戦い続けて 行くことは つらいでしょ

I'm tired, nearing the end of a long week. But it isn't over yet. I guess it'll be over Saturday.

My title means, "to attack, to keep attacking, and to keep going... that's hard, isn't it." Well, that's almost the meaning. It's a song lyric from a free Japanese song called "There is..." by raggio dorato. You can find it on muzie.co.jp. It's a wonderful track.

But man, I'm tired of listening to the same old things. Either that or I'm admiring how prolific certain people's music libraries are. If that makes any sense. How extensive, rather. I, myself, feel like I spend all my time listening to the same stuff. Which is true, actually. It's been that way forever. How else would I become so familiar with the song "Wowowee" enough to lay down hot DDR steps if I didn't listen to it 48 times (I swear that was the number)? Oh, high school...

Not sure where my route will lead me. I guess reaching for the top can be done later. That's the lesson Pilates has taught me. Keep stretching regularly and eventually you'll get there even though it seems like it's ingrained in your nerves for that to be permanently impossible. It's not. Weight training might be teaching me the wrong lessons, though. I don't know. But I feel like I've spent most of 2009 obsessing over things physical, physical pleasures over intellectual ones... I guess that's been my big flaw recently. But I had to solve the puzzle of the heart, or at least resolve it. Just like that one guy laid out a proof of the Poincaré Conjecture with things that he couldn't prove within it. (That's just about the one article about math I have read recently.)

I'm discouraged, I guess. Slightly. And distracted, again. But man, does the brain eat energy. No part of us is as powerful as the brain we've got. No wonder it drains food faster than anything else. I guess I shouldn't pretend like I'm a cheetah, or a lion.

My perfect pushup grips lie dusty in a dusty shelf that doesn't really spice up the room. But without it, I'd feel a little more insecure than I do now. And the same goes for the pushup grips.

But man, I wanted a better body. And I've got it. Of course you can guess 50% of the reason why I wanted it. That 50% has not reaped its expected rewards. So it goes. So I wait until the next morning. Nothing else to happen this late at night. But the night is my domain.

Where's my codomain?

Haha, I guess you could say I cared too much about my image when really I should've constructed myself to look at the whole codomain. Enough math jokes.

I can't wait to go home and feel comfortable eating chocolate chip cookies again. Because I won't be eating them by myself.

It's so weird how those things have to do with each other, and no, this has nothing to do with my weight. More to do with the caffeine, and not frequently staying up late hanging out with other people here. What's the point of the caffeine I guess is my question.